Dedicated to yours truly.

EDIT: I'd like to apologise to anyone who're affected, I still love you guys. :) Just not being myself.

I've never wanted to admit. But yes, after I sort of ended things with X, I was heartbroken, really upset.

I thought that I just needed a day or two to pick myself up, thinking that I am fine after crying.

Bullshit. I did so many things that inevitably got myself hurt.

I hated people who wallow themselves in self-pity, especially after breaking up. Yet, I was the one who wallowed myself in self-pity. I am not going to talk about how I felt, because I'm sure that almost everyone around me knew what happened.

Today, I asked myself, why are you trying so hard? What are you trying to prove?

Then I realised, I wanted to prove that I am still wanted.

That's all. I know that there are so many people who love me but it was not enough. How ignorant can I get. In this short period of time, there was countless times where I had intentions of being the charming flirtatious me. Honestly, now that I look at myself, I don't think that I am charming at all. It's time that I pick myself up and move on. I don't want to continue hurting myself this way.

Moving on,

Shihan.